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When Your Light Frightens You Most
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us”. - Marianne Williamson
Sometimes we want to fail because failure asks nothing of us. Failure does not ask us to plan well, to prepare, to dream, and above all, to have the courage to risk. Failure tells us that anything we do is okay, that we all deserve ribbons and everyone is special when everyone is the same. Failure is that boyfriend or girlfriend from the past who was always fun and good times, but who always let us down.
Success is a demanding taskmaster. Success asks that we plan well and often, that we pay attention to detail, that we have courage and prepare for every contingency because of what we are daring to risk. Success tells us that while all people are special, no one is the same and that while many people want to succeed, not many want to do what that success requires of them. Success is the tough school teacher from our childhood who was always demanding and disciplined, but who always cheered us on.
Our quote above says so much about us doesn’t it? We are so used of the bad things that scare us that we often overlook the fact that the good stuff in life can be just as frightening. But it is this very fear that serves as our survival signal to ask for grace. “Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing” Harriet Braiker told us. Could you be allowing unattainable perfection defeat you?
It seems that the closer we get to actually achieving a goal or realizing a dream the fiercer the fear becomes. It could be that there is a part of you that knows once you give your dream over to the world that you’ll be forever changed, that your life will be different from now on. Life will be new and unknown and it may require new things of you that this little part of yourself doubts are there and you’ll fail. Could the source of your fear be a need for approval from others? The great American industrialist Andrew Carnegie said, “Do not look for approval except for the consciousness of doing your best.” You are doing your best right now, let it be enough.
The very fact that you dared to dream and then went after that dream means there’s more to you than you think. Our dreams are supposed to change us. Our dreams are supposed to challenge us and at first I think they are supposed to scare us even. Because found in those changes, challenges, and fears you find yourself, your real self. So trust that the same part of your heart that gave your desire life will also give you strength in equal measure to thrive happily in the light of your dreams.
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